Friday, October 28, 2011

Whirlwind

Today is the last day of the Gutsy Dad's pre-RLBT vacation time, which has been a total guilty pleasure considering there is no longer an RLBT on the calendar. This vacation time has been filled with visits to and from people we love, a little bit of housework, and a whole lot of just enjoying everyday life.

How wonderful not to have this time filled with the dreaded aura of "lastness." Last church service, last walk to the bus, last dinner out, last dinner in. During the lasts, happiness feels artificial, because I can't help but take note of every single "last time." Each moment is precious, but we, the participants, feel numb. We want to enjoy it while we can, but the impending departure looms. Like slowly ripping off a band-aid, the time before an RLBT can be agonizing. 

Now I wake up in the morning filled with joy and relief, so thankful not to be going through all of that. I feel almost high on it. We could do anything today. No pressure to make it meaningful, no need to wallow in its occurrence.

I want to tell you more about our trip to visit "Uncle" Gregg, our fabulous visit from Aunt Maria, and our whirlwind visit from my Aunt Ginny. How fantastic to enjoy all of these times with loved ones without the dark cloud of "lastness" hanging over them, either.

How blessed we are.

How unsurprising, given all of our good luck, that my desire to motivate is returning full force. I can hardly contain myself.

And so, I won't.

1 comment:

Fizi said...

I am smiling with relief for you all. Try not to feel guilty and revel in the gift of time you have been given. Hugs all round.