2006 was a big, beautiful year, full of the kind of life changes that rock your world and make you take stock of your core (the part of you that is left when your world has stopped rocking). I quit my job, my husband took on major additional responsibilities in his job, we had our first baby, and we moved to Europe. As I said, the kind of changes that rock your world and make you take stock.
When the dust begins to settle from such marvelous upheaval, we can see more clearly again who we are. And then we get to decide whether we like what we see. In my case, and in particular because I desire to be a strong role model for my daughter, the net result of all of these life changes is simply this: the need for more change.
I think many of us women who transition from our younger, gutsy years (in college or grad school or the working world) where we strive to really kick ass and be amazing feel a little lost when that window of time closes. For many, it feels like that window is closing when we pause to start our families, even if having a family is part of our intended trajectory. I'm not saying that we must stop kicking ass or stop discovering or stop striving to be amazing simply because we have started our families, but I do believe that big changes in life are bound to result in at least a little ruffle (if not complete derailment).
The trick is this: not to get stuck in it. Do not wallow in the derailment. I've tried it, and it ain't pretty. Dig out however much you need to in order to aright the train. Dig out so that at least your eyeballs are clear enough to see that the upheaval is, indeed, marvelous. Derailment forces us to pick our path again; it creates the perfect void in which to rebuild and recreate. Discovery is back. And if we can discover what we love, then there's no limit to the kind of kickass, amazing things which are to follow.
I admit that I have been uprooted and derailed and lost. Being a mother is blissful and it kicks my ass at the same time. But if there is one thing I know for sure, dragging one's heiny out of this confusing morass and back into the truly kickass takes determination, commitment, and yes, you guessed it, GUTS.
So watch out world, 'cause I'm digging out. The Gutsy Mom is born and on the loose.